.hold me tight and think of home.

this is my best friend. she is my other half. my lobster. i haven't seen her in a million years. but when i did, we had adventures. we traveled around the world, upside down, to the moon, into stardust, and raped the city. sometimes without even leaving our rooms. one day she left and started to do all of these things in reality. and without me. after her departure we both struggled. there were phone calls at all hours of the morning. she was lonely in her new city. and i was mixed up and destructive in ours. she was starting new, and i was slipping into the cracks of old ways and new heartbreak. i grew weak without her strength, and let myself fall victim to people and emotions that i have always held no interest in before. she fell in love with someone new every day, and i got my heart broken by people i had known for too long. my last two years without her have been a very interesting period. i lost my spontaneity and ease. no longer would i dash around the city on adventures, turning my phone off and ignoring reality, with the comfort of her to guide us. i became conscious and paranoid. i had to be involved and connected to everyone and everything for fear of missing out. i allowed certain characters in my story to abuse me and control my movements and thoughts.

now i am here. two years later. i have broken free from these patterns and allowed myself to be free again. on my own, with my own two lobster claws. i miss my silly adventures with Bird, but now i am in the place to pick up with that again. the sense of freedom i have acquired is unexplainable. i am ready to confront aspects of my life that i was never prepared for before with ease and beauty. and she and i have begun to connect again.

i call this the dawn of my magical period.

in honor of this new period, i will be constructing a series of multimedia, montage, "film" stills combining a bit of her work, found art, and my photographs to document a few of our old adventures. i will be constructing scenes with our images that show the magic of our adventures using scans or different images of us. i will be including notes we wrote to each other, sound clips from songs we shared, hopefully sound clips of our conversations, and film clips that remind me of us. my ideas are somewhat scattered right now as this is the first time i have really worked out side of the dark room aesthetic to create something and i am not a huge fan of photoshop. i am basically flirting with a bunch of ideas right now. i will be scanning some artifacts today and see where it all leads me. it should end up like a story board of an animation, with some static film stills and audio tracks intermingled. stay tuned!